Socialising Q's!

How would be a good way to get out of the habits whilst socialising of:

1) looking for signs in others that they dont like me in some way and trying to predict what they are thinking through their voice tone, body language etc.

2) judging others and myself all the time to a standard of being cool which needs to be perfect, and when were not perfect (as pretty much 100% of people aren’t in some way!) focusing only on the non perfect aspect of behaviour

3)seeking others approval to my behaviour, i must in some way be putting people on a high pedestool and myself low down!?!?!?

I Want:

Whilst in a social situation i need some relaxing & listening tools and methods of getting into the habit of using them whilst socialising like moving tongue to roof of mouth, turning down volume of internal dialogue, relax physiology……….

I want to be quick witted and humourous!

I want the habit of being able to listen when someone is speaking and think what do i know about this subject at the same time so i can then speak back with something valuable to say! instead of mind being occupied by bad habits 1, 2 and 3

I want to be in a thinking frame of im offering people emotions when i speak (eg i am communicating joy or fun or empathy etc) trying to offer them a good positive feeling some way through what im saying and my voice tone body language-facial expressions etc and if they dont want to or for whatever reason aren’t able to accept, understand why and be happy that im also doing it for self and my emotions

(please ignore just above paragraph if it makes no sense its hard to write down so its easy to understand!!)

What processes could i use/follow to achieve what i want and stop my 1, 2 & 3 bad habits i dont want?
eg nlp techniques/exercises, philosopies/metaphors/helpful quotes/ways of thinking etc

Any suggestions on each of the above will be gratefully received

Thank you!

Ryan

Socialising Q’s!

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